Thursday, March 7, 2013

It Started Last Night

Last night was one of "those" nights.  I couldn't sleep.  I was up and down all night.  I don't know what time I finally got to sleep on the couch, but I was wide awake at 6 a.m. with the light outside.

I had plans to have lunch with my mother and go over her paperwork.   The very last thing I wanted to do was to make that drive again, but I'm really trying to be good about keeping to seeing her once a week, since she seems to feel unloved if she doesn't see me often.

I thought about calling her first to let her know I was leaving, but I had just talked to her two days before and felt of course she would remember.  I won't make that mistake again.
Diana Gabladon's characters and I made the trip, stopping en route to take a picture of a statue I had seen on my last trip, when I hadn't had the camera with me.

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It's this cool metal statue that is out in the middle of nowhere right now, but in an area which is being turned into some sort of a small strip mall. 

I was a little later than usual getting onto Hwy 37, the road from I-80 to Hwy 101.  It's 30 minutes along the north shore of San Pablo Bay.

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The area along the road is a wildlife preserve and more than once I have wanted to stop to take pictures of hawks, egrets, and assorted water birds that proliferate along the sides of the road, but there is never a convenient place to stop.

It was just about noon when I pulled up to my mother's house.  I had been fighting sleep and dragged myself out of the car and up the stairs to the house.  Bad mental attitude.  I really wasn't looking forward to the day.

The door was locked and there was no answer to my knock.  I got out my key and opened the door.  The curtains were open and the newspapers were on the couch, so I knew she hadn't died in her sleep.  But there was no sign of her.  I thought she might have gone out for her walk around the lagoon.   But then I saw a note on her counter "Out for lunch with Paula."  I checked her calendar on which she had written "Lunch Bev here" in pencil and then over "Bev" she had written "Paula" in pen.  Strangely, there were four slices of bread n the bread board, as if she had planned to make lunch.  

Well shit.  I had just  driven an hour and a half for nothing.  I took all the knick knacks off of a shelf which the cleaners who came two weeks ago had not cleaned.  She had been very angry about that, pointing out how thick the dust was on the shelf.  She guessed it was just too much work for them.  I sent an angry letter to the cleaning company and the manager called back.  He had been there himself and had asked her if she was sure she didn't want the shelf cleaned and she had told him it was "just too much work" and to leave it alone.  Sigh. 

I took a picture of the shelf before I removed all the stuff, and replaced it in the right order.  I felt good that it was done, and am certain she won't even notice, but I will.

I finally decided to just go on home.  Another hour and a half in Scotland with Gabaldon's characters.  That part was nice but the fighting sleep part was not.

I figured she would call me, so when I sat in the recliner with an NCIS marathon, I remembered to bring the phone to put next to me.  I sat down at 2 p.m. and went to sleep just about instantly.  At 2:13, the phone rang.   A robo call, dammit.  I decided I would call my mother, who was sorry she had missed me, said she had no idea her friend was going to come by and asked if I had gotten the information I needed (I was going to be going through all of her file with her so I could understand what all is there).

I reminded her that I would be back next week, said I had put it on her calendar, and that we had a lunch date with this senior living place in Petaluma.  She didn't remember that.
Her memory is fading much faster these days.   The sooner we find a place, I think the better off we are going to be. 

And yes, next week, I will call her the night before AND the morning before I leave!!
The whole problem is that what with the robo call and calling my mother, I lost the sleepy feeling and could not get back to sleep.  I hate it when that happens.  NOT the condition in which I want to head out to review a show tonight.

1 comment:

Mary Z said...

I really do sympathize with your pain and frustration. Hugs!